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Emozart

by Madmartigan

/
1.
Timing is everything when delivering the bad news... But you cut me right through the middle I fell face first, you're that riddle I will never solve... But still you toyed with this, oh so, easy game to play Let me hope while you were simply plotting you escape... And timing was never our strongest suit Shouldn't have expected anything new But you waited til we were lying in bed...
2.
Never been a big believer in fate or cosmic ties... But I know right from wrong and I know truth from lies. And I know which side of the fence I'm on Melodies and memories hang like anvils in the air You're up there cutting strings... You always seemed unsure about everything until this. I wish I shared the total faith you have in your lack of faith in us. And you know, which side of the fence you're on. But you don't know what I know... We both know which side of the fence we're on
3.
This town is dried out... Feel the ground cave and creak as we move forward. My head is fried out... But I left the heart and soul all undercooked and mushy. My eyes are cried out... Over paralleling lines, different stories, different times that we will spend apart. It's all so different now... It's like we went from friday night to "Sunday morning coming down..." You can't forgive me now... But who can really blame you? Except me at my worst, that is, of course I can't forget you now... Like a dagger through the heart, deserving lyrics far more sharp than what I offer... Are we too young to feel buried and cling to the past?
4.
Chores 04:04
We're tired... We hide between the sheets. So much to talk about, instead we sit and stew for weeks. It's funny how the words became like plastic in our throats And I choke... I am waiting, calculating ways to keep you hesitating. Neither of us can even taste the air anymore. Why did it become a chore to make each other happy? I don't know... If I ever will snap out of this, that hollow kiss That you denied for months (For months now) You always said I'm never serious, baby are you hearing this? And who knows why somethings turn to nothing over time? Do we blame the passion or obligation for wasting our primes? When and why did it become a chore to make each other happy?...
5.
Why, when it comes crashing to this, is it always "I don't know, I don't know..." And you never know I exist til it's drastic... (can't make sense of this all, slam my fist through the wall) But despite all this unidirectional anger I knew it was over before the beginning... And I can't seem to say anything at all. No one can even recognize who it is that you've become. And it is always hit the gas and move it fast and feel higher. And I am starting to get scared the brakes don't even work. And I don't even really think I know where to begin... Only hope that we won't just set the bridge on fire and abandon a good friend now. If we wander that road where it goes then, oh, I assure that neither of us will win. I hoped and prayed for sudden change You brought a lot more of the same I felt my heart strings tug and pull But it's always hardest before it is most fulfilling.
6.
Where I stand: On a rickety bridge over top shark infested water... Back and forth, the space between, "welcome back!" and "who the hell are you to even be here?" Threads of rope, they strain... The poor muscles in my brain can't keep pace with misconceptions of the heart. I'm through repenting. Your eyes, my soul, six strings so unrelenting... The only thing I'll have to compromise is everything. I don't ever wanna give up on this. You're the only place that's ever felt like - You feel like home, you feel like home.
7.
House full of broken mirrors The bad luck it seems to reflect things clearer... Forget me nots that we forgot split us apart. A seven year false start Prolonged the inevitable, but you couldn't handle me in your plans. I couldn't handle myself either, I understand. But you don't seem to see too far past the end of your nose, think it's time we close the door. Obsessing over losing you, lost count of wasted days, This green and purple haze had placed its weight on my shoulders, it's pressure on my chest. And what I'm clinging onto now, it is not what's best for anyone. Bandaged these bloodied knuckles, shards pulled from skin... But your dreams keep me falling again. Wake up sweating, unsure if I even want to remember the past. Can't tell if my bitterness over your relief will last - You're so obviously overjoyed. Unashamed in hoping that it's oh so temporary... What I'm clinging onto... Isn't this what's best for everyone?
8.
Phone lights up on the table, vibration's a quake through the night. A signal flare or a glue trap of glowing blue light like your eyes... And I am splitting at the seams dying to wander right in. And lie helpless while you decide my fate. I can wait but, honey I can only wait for so long... For you to realize that everything you've ever wanted is staring right back in your terrified eyes... And you... Made your intentions so crystal clear But crystal clear grew cloudy with fear and you pulled away You pulled away And you don't need anyone telling you that it's ok to get close But what feels right also seems to be exactly what you are afraid of Make excuses why we need to fall back... When it feels like we should fall right in... So we call when we're vulnerable... And say "make me feel human again..." Make me feel human again...
9.
And she said... "I can't do this anymore, you're fading fast just like before, getting too hard to ignore - it's fucking crazy... And I don't even know - no YOU don't even know what you are running from. What's the point of making promises you never mean to keep? You're suffocating me..." I am clean and focused for the first time But your shadow cast on my mind looms so large These dark thoughts, my only source of confidence lost. I can't imagine that your end feels all that much better though... You know my every weakness - body, mind, soul. How I'm lacking any semblance of this basic self control. Now I see how hard it is to journey when your partner's standing still Recommending zero changes, making fewer. "Moving on" is a relative term when this fire's still burning and I'm still discerning just what it is that I truly have to offer besides messes to clean and this fucked up routine... I confess I won't mean a word that I will say about finally being ok and ready to move past this...
10.
Something dammed my stream of consciousness, I'm only getting a few drops out at a time... You'd think by now they could have bottled some for sale In grocery lines across the USA And all I see clearly are insides of eyelids I'm nursing a break in a heart that's not there I long to feel anything other than my confusion I'm trapped in a silent, lucid nightmare I wake up... The only things I feel inside are fault lines shifting The clock is ticking, the lights are flipping themselves on and off - The walls inside my memory I can hear my father He says "keep at this!," I ask "why bother?" The ones who make it out alive, it seems, are far and few The rest of us, we just have to make due. Prison cell apartment walls, they lock away unfinished dreams That may never see the light of day again now... Shadows of reality and a life of mediocrity, they usher in a stagnation

about

Debut full length from Austin, Tx based Emo band Madmartigan. 10 songs of love and loss and....loss...also some loss in there. It's good. Self Produced. DIY.

credits

released August 16, 2016

Madmartigan is:
Eric Foshee - Vocal/Guitar; Jon Kovar - Bass/Vocal; Joey Lopez-Lopez - Guitar; Jon Deichmann - Drums/Synths

Emozart:
Produced by Eric Foshee & Madmartigan
Recorded/Mixed/Mastered by Eric Foshee
Drums recorded at Space Rehearsal Space & Studio; Everything else recorded at Jon's house or Eric's.

Special Thanks:
YOU.
Our families and friends, Jon G Deichmann, especially. This album is not possible without you generously letting us turn your home into our studio for weeks at a time!
Space Rehearsal & Studio - ESPECIALLY Adam Gibbs. You've been a great friend and invaluable source of advice, information and support every step of our existence as a band and Eric's as our recordist.
Every band we have ever worked with. You are our family.
Every venue that has ever given us somewhere to play.
Taco Bell.

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about

Madmartigan Austin, Texas

Formed in 2011 in the crowded Austin, Tx scene, Madmartigan set themselves apart from the crowd with a sound as uniquely alluring as the city they call home. Interesting song structure, sweeping transitions, & poetic lyrics define one of the more fascinating under the radar Emo groups.
Eric Foshee- Vocal/Guitar/Bass
Jon Kovar - Guitar/Vocals/Bass
Jon Deichmann - Drums/Keys/Bass
... more

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